Before Paul Gets Home
Okso, I RUSHED to get home for the de-mousing (no dead ones at this point, thank god)...and when I call Paul to see where he is, he's having a beer with a friend.
"Er, didn't you impress upon me the need to buy more traps and get home RIGHT AWAY?"
"I'll be there shortly."
In the background, said friend, "It's all my fault."
GRRRRRRRRRRRRR. "Well hey don't expect me to come and help you carry the wine upstairs." (He was on yet another juicer run.)
"What do you mean?"
"Oh never mind!" SLAM. Well, inasmuch as it was my cell phone, there wasn't really a SLAM. But there would have been.
Men! And Paul, so easily distracted by booze. I suppose I'll get over it but now of course, Friend is thinking...ooh, Paul, what a beeyatch.
Yeah yeah yeah. I could have gone for cocktails with a friend but I said nooooooooooooooo...I must get home for the de-mousing.
(*&^(*&(*&*(#*!*&(*(*!!!
So to expand on my thoughts re: threesomes, I am a little too insecure for that. But game if it was another girl--perhaps the girl from my GYM!
I joke. I have trust issues that could kill a walrus. Ok that makes no sense but uh...you get what I mean. Paul was telling me how there are "rules" for that kind of thing. He's done it, of course, in his past life as a semi-rock star in Canada. I have done many things but not that.
And re: porn. My past experience with it isn't great. I tend to giggle. I told Paul I'd rather watch a film with hot love scenes than a porno. Suggestions, please??
Aside: When I was with White Sneakers he was into porn. But he got angry with me because I laughed while watching one of those movies. And isn't it funny, the man who said his girlfriend shouldn't know how to give a bl** job? There's some sort of irony there.
Paul said to me upon hearing this particular White Sneakers story, "I'd be mad if my girlfriend DIDN'T know how to give a bl** job!"
Worry not. Heh.
I'm definitely the sluttiest frap. Today I counted five men I've been with since 2001. Six if you count the guy on New Year's Eve, which I guess you have to because we did er...do it. Did I tell you this? At 8 am on New Year's Day he suddenly jumps up and asks what time it is. Within five minutes he was gone (home to his wife, no doubt). He's also the one that I made out with and texted Mary (remember her, F?) at the same time. Lois said I was "acting out" and was very "angry".
Yeah well...I remember he wanted to take me to another party and I said, "Let's go back to my place and fuck." He was agreeable.
That is super slutty. and hey, if you go back to 2000, there were EIGHT men. Let me see what my grand total is. I'll get back to you but it's definitely in the 20s. is that bad???
"Er, didn't you impress upon me the need to buy more traps and get home RIGHT AWAY?"
"I'll be there shortly."
In the background, said friend, "It's all my fault."
GRRRRRRRRRRRRR. "Well hey don't expect me to come and help you carry the wine upstairs." (He was on yet another juicer run.)
"What do you mean?"
"Oh never mind!" SLAM. Well, inasmuch as it was my cell phone, there wasn't really a SLAM. But there would have been.
Men! And Paul, so easily distracted by booze. I suppose I'll get over it but now of course, Friend is thinking...ooh, Paul, what a beeyatch.
Yeah yeah yeah. I could have gone for cocktails with a friend but I said nooooooooooooooo...I must get home for the de-mousing.
(*&^(*&(*&*(#*!*&(*(*!!!
So to expand on my thoughts re: threesomes, I am a little too insecure for that. But game if it was another girl--perhaps the girl from my GYM!
I joke. I have trust issues that could kill a walrus. Ok that makes no sense but uh...you get what I mean. Paul was telling me how there are "rules" for that kind of thing. He's done it, of course, in his past life as a semi-rock star in Canada. I have done many things but not that.
And re: porn. My past experience with it isn't great. I tend to giggle. I told Paul I'd rather watch a film with hot love scenes than a porno. Suggestions, please??
Aside: When I was with White Sneakers he was into porn. But he got angry with me because I laughed while watching one of those movies. And isn't it funny, the man who said his girlfriend shouldn't know how to give a bl** job? There's some sort of irony there.
Paul said to me upon hearing this particular White Sneakers story, "I'd be mad if my girlfriend DIDN'T know how to give a bl** job!"
Worry not. Heh.
I'm definitely the sluttiest frap. Today I counted five men I've been with since 2001. Six if you count the guy on New Year's Eve, which I guess you have to because we did er...do it. Did I tell you this? At 8 am on New Year's Day he suddenly jumps up and asks what time it is. Within five minutes he was gone (home to his wife, no doubt). He's also the one that I made out with and texted Mary (remember her, F?) at the same time. Lois said I was "acting out" and was very "angry".
Yeah well...I remember he wanted to take me to another party and I said, "Let's go back to my place and fuck." He was agreeable.
That is super slutty. and hey, if you go back to 2000, there were EIGHT men. Let me see what my grand total is. I'll get back to you but it's definitely in the 20s. is that bad???
posted by Scorpio | 6:12 PM
2 Comments:
oh p. what a trip down memory line that was. that was the new year we were on the phone for 8 hours wasn't it?
No, that was the year before. But thank you for reminding me to say that I much preferred spending New Year's Eve with YOU XOXOXOX
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